Saturday, June 30, 2012

The 5 things for 5 years!

Today is our Five year wedding anniversary. It's a true testimony to God that we made it this far but God has blessed us and what seemed to be an impossible road has now become just a few bumps along the way.

In honor of that here is my list of five things I learned in my five short years of marriage.

1.  Make sure porn stays out of your marriage! By this I don't just mean the incredibly disgusting stuff you find on the internet and in magazines that so many men struggle with. I am talking about woman porn. Pornography is the substitution of reality for a more pleasurable fantasy. (read this article to hear more about this) This can kill your marriage quicker then quick. Stop looking at other women's husband and thinking about how great they are with their kids, how wonderful they are at leading their, and everything else you wish your Hubby would do! Start taking time daily to remind yourself of why you love your hubby and how grateful you are God gave you him!

2. Fairytales can be bad when they come in the above mentioned scenario. Real life fairytales can happen! The kind of Fairytales only God can weave together. The kind that happens when you start trusting God and praying continuously for your spouse. You CAN'T change your husband but God sure CAN! Don't give in to the depths of despair and believe what the father of lies has to say when you are going through a difficult time. God has brought the two of you together and he does desire for you to love each other and be a happy team! Keep working at it and keep praying and you will be living your very own unique fairytale!

3. Let it go. For the love chocolate let it go! I promise he didn't mean to hurt your feelings. When he said he thought he said what he meant not what you thought he meant! Don't drudge it back up every fight. She his imperfections but then see where he is really truly trying to change. Look in the mirror sometimes and realize how incredibly difficult and frustrating you can be. But when it doubt let it go. He didn't mean to hurt you and he is sorry even if he don't quote Shakespeare.

4.  Life gets hard. You get tired and the kids get sick. But make time for the bow chick a bow bow. Be the initiator sometimes and go the extra mile. You won't ever regret it and your hubby will be a happier man for it.

5. The things in life that take the most work are the things most worth it! It's hard work! It is NOT for the faint of heart or for the selfish person. But Marriage without a doubt is an institution of God and wit his help we can make it work. Whatever you do never introduce the D word. The D word has become a swear word in house and is never said in reference to our marriage EVER! There is not exiting this ride baby sometimes its hanging on for dear life but most of the time it is the most fun ride of my life and having someone to share it with makes it all the more special.

He is my best friend and I love him more today then I did five years ago when I walked down the aisle! 

Sunday, June 24, 2012

50 Shades of Red

Maybe your like me and you find that you become easily attached to the characters in your favorite t.v. shows and books. I cry when they face hardship and rejoice when they finally get that break they have been waiting for. I hold my breathe and turn each page in anticipation of them finally getting back together.  I may just get a TAD bit attached to the characters and their lives.

I know you probably already have read some great articles on why you should NOT read 50 shades of Grey but in case you didn't here (If you care) is my 50 cents!

I would like to point out first and foremost my  hubby is great. He is kind, gentle, compassionate, and so beyond patient with me. When I put on a few lbs and when I don't wear make up he loves me all the same. He never asks for much from me and loves me unconditionally. Frankly, I don't deserve him! He is everything (from what I hear) this Mr. Grey character is not. So why then would it be a big deal for someone like me to read this story? Well, because I am a human with a sin nature and sometimes the idea of a "fantasy" relationships may appeal to me. The idea of getting out of the mundane to escape my reality and be someone else. Maybe this is to forward. I have never been one to be afraid to really share the truth about myself! But what is happening to us as women that in order to get in the mood we need to read these kind of books. When did wonderful loving sometimes extremely annoying men become not enough for us?
 I won't read this book. Not only because I shouldn't but because honestly I can't. I can't allow myself to get swallowed up by these characters and story lines and land in a fantasy world where being in bondage and controlled by a man is somehow weirdly attractive. But then again maybe your not like me and you don't find yourself engrossed in these kind of stories thinking about the story lines even when your not reading them and wondering what it would be like to be her. But what if you are? Do you draw the line somewhere? Why is it gross and perverted if men watch porn but as woman its perfectly acceptable to read these kinds of things?
So maybe I am 50 shades of red admitting these kind of things to you but I don't understand why we hold our hubbies to such a high standard but allowing ourselves some kind of get out jail free cards for this stuff! Women let's stand up, let's show the men we are holding ourselves to the same standards!  Let's admit we as women can struggle too. We can get lost in stories lusting after characters that are nothing like our hubbies and wishing to escape from our realities. Lets not pretend that because everyone else said it's sooo good and has a great storyline is an excuse to sub come to one of satan's stupid tricks!